Watching Vampire Academy

This is unusual for me, but I didn’t have a post written up and I was already planning on watching the movie adaptation of Vampire Academy, so I decided to pull up a Word Document and write up all my thoughts as I watched it. Since this is already late and the post won’t go up at midnight, I’m just going to copy and paste it and then hopefully write a follow-up post tomorrow to talk about it more. If you don’t care about VA at all, then I apologize – I just don’t have enough reviews and such right now to have anything else right now!

It probably goes without saying, but there will be lots of spoilers for both the first book, Vampire Academy, AND the movie. Read at your own risk.

  • And it’s starting – please be good or bad in a good way!
  • M.I.A.! I love this song – it’s reminds me of The Mindy Project. Unfortunately, The Mindy Project doesn’t make me think of a vampire book.
  • Are there going to be a lot of accents in this movie? I thought Lissa was American.
  • I’m glad I watched this after reading the first book – otherwise I think I would really be lost right now.
  • Feeding scenes are weird no matter what kind of vampires they are.
  • Explosion! And fighting! Not really a fan of those things, but I’m glad to see that Rose can still take care of herself in this movie.
  • Oh my god, Dmitri looks even worse than I remember from all the previews and pictures and such! I wasn’t a big fan of him in the early books, but definitely not shipping him with Rose in the movie.
  • I always wondered how you said “Dhampir.”
  • Rose is a lot more talkative than I would have expected – at least in terms of mindless chattering.
  • Dramatic music – I didn’t remember anything big happening this early in the movie. Was this in the book? Or is it to show what Strigoi are since they can’t use narration as much?
  • Why would you leave her alone in the car?! Living defenceless people alone in the car is always a really bad idea!
  • Am I supposed to know who this Strigoi is? And it looked like that guy’s neck was snapped – why didn’t he die right away?
  • This is overwhelming of me – it has to be really confusing for newcomers.
  • A lot more pop culture references than I was expecting.
  • Shouldn’t Rose be taller than Lissa? She should be big and strong, shouldn’t she?
  • So many names being thrown at me at once! I obviously don’t remember everyone – I forgot about some drama with Lissa’s ex-boyfriend or whatever is going on.
  • Seriously, so many accents in this movie!
  • Um, this is the headmistress – is she seriously allowed to call one of her students (or former student) a “blood whore”? It has even worse connotations in the book – shouldn’t this be really, really bad?
  • Lissa’s compulsion is shown in a weird way in this movie.
  • Wait, I thought Lissa had no powers (other than spirit) – why is she apparently able to do fire and water?
  • Are ravens or whatever normally that big? And how did the creepy Ms. Karp get upstairs so quickly?
  • I was going to try and write a review while watching this – obviously that’s not going to happen anymore.
  • Seriously, they’re all American!
  • And mean girl drama – so much fun. I know this is from the director of Mean Girls, but still, keeping the mean girl antics to a minimum.
  • “Your boobies”? Seriously?
  • Wait, what’s with the eyes? Wait, this is how we know she’s inside Lissa’s head? Weird…
  • Seriously? An “I don’t bite” joke already?
  • More drama! And so much info-dumping through dialogue.
  • I can’t remember what I thought of Christian back in the first book, but he’s kind of creepy and weird in the movie.
  • It took a while for Rose to get hit in the head, considering she was just sitting there.
  • I feel like I’m seeing bits of Veronica from The Heathers – which makes sense, considering the writer.
  • Not a fan of feeding scenes for sure.
  • “She would do anything for you.” Do I detect some foreshadowing?
  • Natalie talks very quickly, doesn’t she? Much different from Modern Family.
  • Um, Mia is not new – why is she new in this movie?
  • Romantic drama! So intriguing!
  • Ah, all-school mass – brings back memories. Not good ones, of course.
  • When was there drama in the church?
  • I think this fling with Jesse is even more abrupt in the movie than it was in the book.
  • This yellow eye thing is weird. And why does she talk out loud so that everyone can hear you talking to Lissa?
  • WAS THAT THE CAT? I CAN’T HANDLE DEAD CATS!
  • Oh good, the cat is still alive and is comforting poor Lissa. I can brief again – until they show the dead animal again.
  • So far in the movie, their relationship doesn’t seem like it should have developed beyond simply being a teacher and a student. If I’m supposed to be rooting for Rose and Dmitri to be together already, then that’s definitely not going to happen.
  • Wow, is this teacher completely blind to high school manipulation? And why the hell would he basically call Rose a feedbag in the middle of class? He should have stopped reading it! And why is the teacher allowing Ray to call her a tramp?!
  • Seriously, isn’t Mason supposed to be Rose’s friend? Why the hell is he shaming someone who’s supposed to be his friend based on a rumor?
  • This movie isn’t really giving me a minute to breathe and process what I’m seeing. Quiet moments can be okay, movie.
  • What accent is the Queen supposed to have now? And why is she shaming Lissa in front of everyone? Wasn’t she a bit more subtle in the book?
  • Ew, was there wall licking in the book as well?
  • So far one of the biggest threats in this movie is Mia. Was it like this in the book, too?
  • Why would she call Rose “Dhampir”? They’re best friends! I included them on my Top Ten Tuesday of awesome friends!
  • Is Dmitri’s accent supposed to be sexy or something?
  • At least they didn’t get rid of Rose’s confidence. We have enough female protagonists who don’t like themselves at all.
  • Still don’t ship Rose and Dmitri, even if they’re “bonding.”
  • Compulsion scenes are almost as weird as the feeding scenes.
  • Didn’t Lissa have a little less confidence and quippy lines in the book?
  • Um, why is Natalie talking about her virginity?
  • I think this is the first indication that Rose likes Dmitri – the chemistry certainly isn’t there.
  • Enough with the vampire puns! I get it, the “stakes” are too high – you don’t really have to point it out.
  • Was the headmistress involved in the story at all in the book? I don’t remember that at all.
  • No chemistry! Stay away from underaged Rose, Dmitri! This is creepy, not romantic and ship-baiting!
  • Shouldn’t it be harder to break into the headmistress’s office?
  • There was a lot less mystery surrounding Ms. Karp in the book.
  • Wait, is this a dream? Christian was not a Strigoi in the book at all. His hatred of them was kind of a defining feature. Seriously, this has to be a dream, right – I mean, Dmitri appears to be dead, and Lissa is a Strigoi. OK, definitely a dream.
  • Where’s Lissa’s depression? The inclusion of mental issues was a nice addition to the book.
  • Why is everything about shadow-kissed Anna so out in the open?
  • “My blood bitch”? Did they change Lissa’s personality completely or something?
  • Lissa is not the only princess at the school – or at least, she wasn’t. And again, why does Lissa have so much magic?
  • Why is there so much friend drama – they’re supposed to be best friends!
  • “You’re making this about high school and there’s something more” – this sums up the movie quite well.
  • Creepy music – something is about to happen.
  • NOT THE CAT! I ALREADY WEN THROUGH THIS, I CAN’T DO IT AGAIN!
  • Wait, no! She was cutting herself! They were mental illness issues, not a side effect of magic!
  • Um, what’s with the visions of Ms. Karp? Or are they memories? And what did she mean, there’s something more than Strigoi? I thought they were the Big Bads and that there wasn’t anything mysterious surrounding Ms. Karp’s death!
  • Why exactly does Rose have so much power with the adults? And is anythiny following the book’s plot at this point?
  • Seriously, why does Ms. Karp have such a big role in this movie?
  • It’s official – the poor cat is no longer with us. I desperately need one of my cats to cuddle right now.
  • Yes, let’s blame the girl who seems to have mental illness.
  • Now they’re showing that Lissa is a bit uneven, mood-wise, but it seems more like drama than mental illness. And stop making Lissa call Rose a blood whore – they’re supposed to be friends!
  • That was not realistic looking at all, but in a completely awful way. Legs just don’t normally break like that.
  • Still don’t feel the chemistry between them.
  • “How long have you been in crush with him”? I’m pretty sure that Lissa is supposed to sound like a regular teenager.
  • Yes, they haven’t addressed the twistedness of the whole “Moroi” come first and all that. There’s a lot less social commentary and such in the movie.
  • I feel like I’m watching high school movie right now. What’s wrong with being a better combination of high school and vampire?
  • The necklace! It’s the necklace! I know what’s coming!
  • Ooh, so dramatic, hijacking Lissa’s computer to scare her!
  • I think Rose is pretty sarcastic and funny most of the time, but sometimes they try too hard with her dialogue.
  • There’s a Katy Perry song in this? It seems slightly out of place.
  • Well, at least it doesn’t sound like they’re going to try and pin it all on the girl – yet, anyway.
  • I’m still not sure what I think of Mason.
  • And now they’re making Mia freak out – I guess she’s not going to remain unscathed now.
  • Am I supposed to laugh at the poor headmistress? Because I don’t think it’s funny that they turned her into an antagonist.
  • It was kind of weird in the book, but the Dmitri-Rose scene seems even more out of place and confusing in the movie. And still really creepy – there definitely seems like a big age gap right now.
  • Why are you burning the poor dress?!
  • Why is he petting Lissa’s head? The scene is already distressing enough!
  • And the magic scenes continue to be weird as well.
  • That sounded like a fake cane being thrown across the room. Tsk, tsk, props department.
  • Again, stop leaving people in the car – it never seems to work out.
  • Why does Rose think that she’s a guardian already? Book Rose didn’t seem that arrogant – she would have known that she needed to learn more so that she could truly protect Lissa.
  • A creepy dog! Why did we lose the adorable cat but not the creepy dogs that kind of make me think of The Hunger Games?
  • Not everyone has to have a quip to throw out. And way to go, killing one of the few female guardians and POCs.
  • I don’t really care what happens to Dmitri – that’s not a good thing, right?
  • The female guardian is still alive! Yay! Now just bring back the cat!
  • Why is there so much animal abuse in this movie? I know they’re evil dogs, but don’t set them on fire!
  • And more feeding. And jealous gazes from Dmitri. Yes, because Rose is totally in danger of leaving you for Lissa. Actually, that’s a good idea, as long as movie-Lissa stops being so mean to Rose.
  • Rose seems too flippant sometimes.
  • The priest talks about being shadow-kissed in mass and yet the headmistress doesn’t know what it means? That makes sense.
  • Ooh, bad things happening in the background!
  • Natalie seems more like Haley right now.
  • I thought Strigoi weren’t like themselves at all – and that they didn’t pause to have a big speech about how much high school sucks for them.
  • Let me guess – Dmitri is going to save the day instead of Rose being awesome. I want girl power!
  • Well, there was some girl power, as well as a sign that Rose is still a young girl with lots of humanity. And Rose definitely helped save the day in the end!
  • Hmm, a bunch of old dudes in the background. I guess we’re just going to ignore them.
  • Does Lissa hate high fiving because she’s supposed to be all prim and proper?
  • Lissa’s spirit power is supposed to be a secret, right? And she was better at respecting the Queen while still working around her.
  • A big end-of-the-movie speech, huh? This really feels like a high school movie, not a vampire movie. At least the girls’ skirts are actually long, and not super-short like absolutely no real uniform skirts are. But it looks like I’m partially wrong – there are some short skirts as well.
  • They brought up slut shaming for a mere second? Please, address that more – I would love this movie so much if it did!
  • And we’re back to more romantic drama. Sorry, but I don’t care that much.
  • The bird is alive but the cat is still dead! I’m not going to get over the cat!
  • It’s pretty looking.
  • What?! More Ms. Karp? And there was never a huge colony of Strigoi nearby in the book! If they did a sequel, were they just going to completely change the plot of the second book, or only partly change it?

These are all my thoughts, completely unedited, as I was watching the movie. So, I definitely ramble and probably often didn’t make sense – sorry about that! Hopefully this was a fairly entertaining post and less of a filler then it really is…

Oh, and for the record – this movie definitely isn’t a new favorite, but I think I did enjoy myself while watching it. That might partly be because I was having so much fun writing all of my snarky and rambling thoughts as they popped into my head, but either way I was entertained and I don’t think I was wasting my time, and that’s a good enough sign for me right now! If they made a sequel, I would definitely check it out, but I’m not going to hold my breath (and not just because that expression reminds me of the Dreaded Sentence)!

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5 thoughts on “Watching Vampire Academy

  1. This is hilarious! I just watched it for the first time a few weeks ago and SO MANY of your thoughts were running through my head as well.

    The Lissa accent totally threw me off, too. Like…huh? That’s so random, and…why?

    I also hated how Dmitri looked in the movie and I really didn’t think they had that much chemistry either.

    Oh, and just to answer your question…the whole thing is that Moroi are supposed to be really lean and tall and model-like, while Dhampirs are shorter, curvier, and more compact. Rose could definitely have used a little more muscle on her, but I thought that they proportions were actually correct in regards to how they matched up with the book’s descriptions.

    “Enough with the vampire puns! I get it, the “stakes” are too high – you don’t really have to point it out.” AWESOME no pun intended thing here 😛 I was laughing so hard. “POINT”!

    And — oh my god — I was SO mad about the whole cutting thing and how they made that a side effect of the magic. Like…no. Just no. Why would you ruin that and make it so stupid? Lissa’s issues with mental health was a hugely positive aspect of Vampire Academy for me, so it really sucked that they turned it into something so lame and not relatable.

    Loved this post! 🙂

    1. The accents just kept throwing me and bothering me. I mean, they’re supposed to be American! The Queen probably has one and I’m sure Dmitri had one, but not so many other characters should have, at least from what I remember!

      I’m not sure there were many people who were happy with the actor for Dmitri or their chemistry (or lack thereof), at least based on what I’ve heard, so we’re not the only ones!

      Hmm, I didn’t even remember that, but now that you mention it, I do remember Rose talking about how thin and lean and such the Moroi are. Thanks for pointing that out – I now have one less thing to complain about!

      I hate to say this, but I think I was so tired and such that I didn’t even notice my own pun there. I was just rambling, not trying to be punny!

      Yeah, I think I had heard somewhere else that they changed things, but I was still so mad while watching it. Even though it’s not a focus of the books, the fact that mental illness is addressed is a great thing, and it’s so disappointing that they just brushed it aside. They could have had such a great message without putting a spotlight on it, but they didn’t even try.

      I’m glad you liked the post – I was scrambling for something since I didn’t have anything scheduled and I had enjoy reading some live tweets of the movies when it was in theaters, so I figured it was worth a shot! 😀

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